The War On Faith - THB

In the beginning there was but a void and the LORD came and
spake saying "Christopher!"
2 And Christopher did state "What!?!"
3 "There is inequity in the land" sayeth the LORD "and thou shalt
filleth the void within these so called Holy scriptures that thy
brethren shall see the path to righteousness."
4 And Christopher looked upon the face of the LORD and spake
saying "I'm really busy right now."
5 But the LORD thy God is a persistent fucker, and he went on
saying "How can thee let thy brother wallow in such filth? How
can thee sit upon thy ass, knowing the word of the LORD and
not act to deliver it to thy brothers?
6 How can thou sitteth watching Southpark when thou knowest
all manner of fucking morons are running amok carrying my
banner?
7 Thou shalt taketh pen in hand and scribe the holy and pure
word of God."
8 And it was Christopher who again replied stating, "Can I at
least use a computer instead? Pens are laden with inequity and
I do look upon them with loathing.
9 Who can not say that they have looked upon my handwriting
and not found it unworthy, my LORD?"
10 And the LORD heard the words of Christopher, and he knew
that they were good.
11 And the LORD was happy saying, "Thou mayest typeth thine
ass off."
12 "Cool" stated the servant of God.

And God stated "Thou shalt be blessed for the sweat of thy brow
and the smoke off thy keyboard for thou hast been chosen to pull
forcefully the heads of the pretty flock of white sheep from their
unholy holes.
2 The scientists and professors, whom are verily thy brothers and
sisters, they have written to great lengths the works and deeds of
thy LORD, but they have failed.
3 They have failed to reach the dimwits. For when the dimwits did
look upon the words of thy brethren it did make them drowsy and
they did rebel into sleepfullness.
4 Thou doth not speaketh the scholarly language, so thou mayest
scribe my holy book in laymen's speach so that the dimmest bulb
in the Fundy chandelier shalt be able to clearly understand.
5 And when thou meanest to say 'DAMN' thou shall not sayeth
'DARN' nor shall ye say 'DANG' for all such pretty little words are
distasteful to me.
6 Thou shalt not pussyfooteth around.
7 And thou shalt useth lots of shit like 'thou' and 'shalt' for such
words doth soundeth fucking cool, and the word of the LORD thy
God should certainly soundeth fucking cool.
8 In short, tell those fuckers what's what in the fucking
Book of Who."

Ch2 10pm
Seinfeld
On tonight's
show Jerry's
friends babble on
endlessly about
semi-psychotic
meaningless
horse shit.

Ch26 11pm
Gilligan's Island
On this show the
castaways have
a chance to get
off the island, but
Gilligan fucks it
up, then they all
forgive him at the
end.

Ch5 12am
Houston public
access channel.
NAMBLA and the
Bishop Peterson
present the
Houston Alter
Boy Of The
Month photo
shoot.

Ch7 1am
Houston 3rd
Baptist Church
Textbook
Bonfire.